Why Do Baby Clothes Have Pockets?

I like ranting about silly things.  No, it doesn’t mean I am genuinely enraged by them and it doesn’t mean I ‘don’t have anything more important to worry about’ (both stances I’ve seen on the weird and wonderful internet).  I merely find it soothing to have a good rant about small annoyances sometimes.  That being the case, here are some of my bugbears when it comes to baby and children’s products:

Pockets in Baby Clothes

Why do baby clothes have pockets?  What, exactly, do these clothes manufacturers think babies – or even toddlers – need to put in their pockets?  Little tubes of nappy cream??  Teething toys??  Of course not.  But do you know what actually does end up in those pockets?  Food.  Vests/t-shirts with a front pocket on the chest are particularly bad for this.  One of Baby Bear’s pockets got sort of glued shut by cheese that had been melted and frazzled in the washing machine and tumble drier.  Pockets on trousers means they’re less comfortable and they take longer to dry.  If pockets really are essential to the design of the item of clothing in terms of aesthetics, why not make it one of those fake/sewn up pockets as opposed to a functioning one?  Plenty of adults’ clothes – which really could do with having actual pockets – have those fake pockets.  It would save on fabric and it would mean there was no chance of finding raisins, half chewed toast, or any number of disgusting things in the bloody pockets before – or more likely – after washing the item of clothing.

No ‘Menu’ Option on DVDs

Why does Dreamworks try to force their customers to watch all the trailers on their DVDs?  Most DVDs (whether for kids or adults) let you hit the ‘menu’ button after language selection and a couple of mandatory screens about terms of use or piracy or unicorns or…something – I don’t really pay attention.  Some make you watch the trailers the first time round but on subsequent viewings you can get to the menu straightaway.  Dreamworks DVDs don’t allow any ‘menu’ pressing and make you at least skip each trailer.  On one (I’m looking at you Shrek 2) you can’t even skip and have to fast forward (it’s like time travelling back to the days of VHS, which is not something I’m particularly nostalgic about) through trailers and some interview.  With a whinging toddler and crying baby waiting for the film to come, I don’t appreciate the added hassle and time.  Give me the choice between a Pixar film and a Dreamworks one and I’m always going to pick Pixar for this very reason.

Inaccurate Scale on Toys

Another bugbear of mine is children’s toys that have dogs three times the size of elephants or beds the same size as a plate.  If you’re going to make a play mat with trees and mountains alongside various insects, fish, snakes etc. then make some sort of effort on scale.  It may be impractical to be completely accurate, I get that, but making a ladybird 10 times the size of an ant and a quarter of the size of a tree is just lazy.  Train sets are bad for this, too.  The people you get with wooden train sets are invariably far too big for the trains and absolute giants compared to any buildings.  I understand tiny people would be a choking hazard but slightly smaller people and slightly larger buildings surely isn’t too much to ask?

There are others, I’m sure.  Maybe I’ll do a ranty blog post every few months as more things come to my attention.  If you have some sort of reasoned, rational explanation for any of the above…I don’t really care.  If you have other examples of idiotic or irritating baby or kid’s product designs, on the other hand, by all means let me know about them!

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